Snarky Couch Potato
Just another WordPress.com site

X-Factor Top 32 Rankings!

Following the last of the “houses” episodes, I feel like I can finally rank the contestants. Since they’re still trapped in the categories, I’ll rank them that way. It wouldn’t be fair for my bottom 8 spots to belong to the groups, would it?

BOYS-

Brian Bradley- I think he’s my guilty pleasure, because he’s an annoying child rapper. We’ve never had a rapper on a voting talent competition before, and I’m interested to see how far he can go. I also think he’s mildly talented. He’s not nearly as hardcore as he thinks he is though. 50 Cent was shot NINE TIMES… Brian Bradley’s got some catching up to do. It’d be interesting to hear how the rap industry feels about this kid.

Marcus Canty- Good vocals. I didn’t think I’d be ranking him this high, but the rest of the boys let me down.

Chris Rene- The track was too loud, and you can’t really hear him sing. I’ve never thought he was a great vocalist. He’s just a little hip-hop and he’s got a story. I doubt he wins, but he’ll make the top 12.

Tim Cifer-He’s better than Skeylor, and I’d be hard pressed to pick between him and Brennan. Right now, Tim edges out Brennan… a bit… knowing that he’d probably go home on Top 16 week.

Brennan Hunt- He is cheesy, but the talent in the guys category is lacking. Really bad, actually. He could earn a top 4 spot simply because everyone else is offensively terrible.

Skyelor Anderson- He’s too shy for this. He’s not ready. His voice is shaky too. I don’t think X-Factor is ready to embrace country.

Nick Voss- He’s terrible. Why is he here?

Philip Lomax- One thin became clear during his performance. He’s faking the Sinatra sound. He loses it in his upper register, which is gross by the way. I thought he’d be like Bruno Mars, but now I just hope he goes away. Please?

 

GIRLS-

Melanie Amaro- Let’s be honest… she can really sing. She’s also humble, which I like. She’s actually not my favorite to listen to, but I can’t deny her talent. I think Simon could have chosen a better song for her though.

Caitlyn Koch- I’d buy her album right now. I’m serious. I love the simplicity of her voice, just a little more than Drew’s.

Drew Ryneowicz- Her and Caitlin could be an unstoppable duo, but they’re separate. I think Caitlin’s voice is a bit more developed, but I like Drew almost as much. Almost.

Rachel Crow- This was an interesting arrangement… all they did was strip it down and play it a bit slower. It did her voice well. I hope she’s not too young for the whole competition, but right now, I’d give her my vote.

Jazzlyn Little- What a bizarre arrangement. I’m not sure it did her any favors. I do think her vocals were on point. I’m not sure if she should continue on… the girls are pretty talented.

Tora Woloshin- I loved her audition, but she has yet to live up to that moment for me. I think I’m ready to let her go after her underwhelming Satisfaction.

Simone Battle- Her talent is questionable, her voice is shaky. I’ve yet to be blown away from her, HOWEVER she does have potential to be a manufactured pop star, which is what this competition seems to be looking for. There are way more talented girls though.

Tiah Tolliver- Let’s just be honest. She’s going to need a lot of autotuning, and producing, to make her sound good. Simon should just sign her and make an album if he’s so confident, because a weekly live competition is not gonna get her a record deal.

GROUPS-

The Brewer Boys- I didn’t love their song, but it was OK. I think they might be the last group standing when this is all said and done. I bet tweens love them.

The Stereo Hoggz- I think that since the judges want 4 groups, Stereo Hoggz deserve one of those 4 slots. In the real world, I’d find someone else for this slot, and eliminate all the groups.

InTENsity- I’d cut a few people from the group, just to be honest. They were just so-so.

2 Squard- A mediocre performance, but they also had a really tough son. What in God’s name compelled Paula to give them Bohemian Rhapsody?

Lakoda Rayne- Essentially, four girls who are secretly hoping the other three die. There’s so much unspoken tension among these girls, it’s freaky. They all look like they want to do their own thing, even when singing together. It’s an uncomfortable performance to watch. I don’t remember liking any of these girls as soloists either.

The Anser- Our American education system is bad enough as it is without this group trying to confuse the youth of America into dropping the W from answer. Plus, their vocals aren’t clean… at all.

Illusion Confusion- What a terrible song choice. I remember them being better, but this song does nothing for them.

4Shore- The lead singer needs to change, STAT. Does anyone else realize he can’t sing? Am I crazy? He’s always sharp… and squeaky. Worst act in the top 32.

OVER 30’s-

Leroy Bell- Singing “To Make You Feel My Love” again. This time, it was actually chosen for him. I think he’s amazing, and he’s actually my favorite contestant in the show.

Josh Kradjik- What an amazing voice. Seriously. I can’t wait to have weeks of him singing, and hopefully an album. You’ll never make another burrito again.

Stacey Frances- Less is more. Still, she can definitely sing. I just think she overdoes it sometimes. She’s an older version of Melanie Amaro, but she cries way too much. Melanie holds her stuff together.

Elaine Gibbs- Strong singer, but she’s not a star. Still, don’t count out her vocals, cause they are spot on.

James Kenny- I think he’s got a good voice, but no stage presence. I think he’ll struggle in this competition without a band behind him.

Tiger Budbill- I don’t think the song did him justice. His competition is fierce. His voice is just average. He’s nowhere near everyone else in his category, except maybe Dexter.

Dexter Haygood- I think he’s living based on his story, and some tiny scrap of talent. There’s no way he wins the whole thing. He’s just not good enough, and everything he does feels like he’s imitating someone else.

Christa Collins- Her vocals weren’t on point the whole time. She’s too forgettable for me. She’s been fodder this whole time, and her performance didn’t change that for me.

 

TUESDAY! Who gets cut? Who made the top 16? There are conflicting spoiler reports out on the internet, so don’t trust them. I’ve seen two different sets of people (mostly different anyway), and random spoilers like “Brian Bradley doesn’t make the top 16, but LA Reid offers him a record deal anyway.” Silly stuff like that.

Advertisements

No Responses to “X-Factor Top 32 Rankings!”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: